When we were kids dad would sing us this silly Simon Slick song.

There was a man whose name was Simon Slick.
He owned a mule with dreary eyes, and how that mule could kick.

He would node his head and wag his tail and greet you with a smile.
Then gently telescope his hind leg and raise you half a mile.
He was quick as lightning, he had an iron jaw.
He was just the thing to have around to tame your mother-in-law.

ah, ah, ah, ah

He kicked a tomascat over the fence, he pulverized a hog.
Dissected seven Chinamen and kicked a yeller dog.
He kicked the feathers off a goose, he broke an elephants back.
He stopped a Texas railroad train and kicked it off the tracks.

ah, ah, ah, ah

He stopped a steamboat with his head and kicked it out of sight.
He kicked a boarding house down at twelve o'clock one night.
While the boarders stood around without any cloths gasping for their breath.
He ran his hind leg down his throat and kicked himself to death.

ah, ah, ah, ah

Simon Slick

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